I’m a fertility doctor – here’s the exact number of times a week you should have sex to get pregnant 0 89

TRYING to have a baby is an all consuming business.

Hopeful parents can become obsessed with apps and tests that track ovulation and tell them when they should have sex.

GettyCouples should be having sex every other day to boost their chances of getting pregnant[/caption]

But a fertility expert has said there is no need for that.

According to Professor Adam Balen, former chairman of the British Fertility Society, you just need to have regular sex – about three times a week.

He said it truly is that simple, and by focussing so much on ovulation, couples might forget to have sex at other times too.

He told the Daily Mail: “Couples should ideally be having sex every other day to maximise their chances of having a baby.

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“If men do not have sex regularly, older sperm building up in their body can release chemicals which may cause other sperm to die.

“Women sometimes get too hung up on ovulation, wait only for that day to have sex, and do it less often as a result.

“Couples trying to conceive often focus just on the time of ovulation to have sex. But you need to have sperm there waiting for the egg.”

“We have become too hi-tech in our approach to life generally and that extends to getting pregnant.

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“Women should be aware of when they are ovulating but not tie themselves in knots over it and forget the importance of having sex generally.”

The NHS consultant in reproductive medicine also said focussing so much on ovulation can lead to men “having sex to order”, which isn’t good for them.

Many people have reported falling pregnant and finding it a less stressful process by using apps or devices.

But some experts fear they are starting to hinder more than help.

One, Professor Allan Pacey, raised concerns more people need help conceiving nowadays, perhaps because they aren’t having enough sex.

Another fertility expert spoke to the Sun to reveal when you can know if you are most fertile, without relying on apps.

Hannah Pearn advised that you are most fertile five days after your period, but it can be any time between two to 10 days.

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She explained: “Don’t rely on apps to tell you when you are most fertile – many are based on algorithms and don’t always tell you the best time. 

“Your ovulation can change day every month and isn’t always on day 14 so if you rely on the algorithm you can easily miss it.”

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My bitter ex told lies to my friends about my ‘small manhood’ after I dumped her 0 41

DEAR DEIDRE: MY ex is so bitter about being dumped that she is spreading nasty rumours around our friendship group – saying I’m rubbish in bed and have a small todger.

She never complained when we were together, but last week she told the girls in our group that being with me was “like kissing a soggy lettuce leaf” and that she “literally didn’t feel a thing when we were having sex” because I’m so small.

My ex is so bitter about being dumped that she is spreading nasty rumours around our friendship group – saying I’m rubbish in bed and have a small todger

I’m 25 and she’s 24. I think part of it is jealousy.

She knows a couple of the other girls fancy me and I think she’s trying to sabotage any chance I have with them.

Not that I’m even planning anything.

She’s so insecure and has a vicious tongue on her.

I’m tempted to let each of her so-called friends know what she really says about them in private.

Even her best friend gets a nasty critique every time she posts anything on Instagram.

Get in touch with Deidre

Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.

Send an email to deardeidre@the-sun.co.uk

You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.

Her top is either too short, or her hair looks like wire, or her laugh is fake . . . it goes on and on.

I don’t regret splitting up with her but this last trick has really infuriated me.

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DEIDRE SAYS: Don’t let yourself stoop to her level.

You can make it clear she is lying without playing her game, which would only escalate tensions and reflect badly on you.

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You could maybe reply with: “Let’s just say she never complained when we were together and nor have any of my other exes.”

Your friends will soon see her behaviour for what it is – jealous insecurity.

My partner said he was on a work trip – but he was actually getting married and on his honeymoon 0 28

DEAR DEIDRE: MY partner said he was on a work trip two months ago, but he had actually got married and been on honeymoon.

Our relationship had become a bit predictable, but we still had regular sex and nice days out with our two young sons.

My partner lied about his work trip – he was really on his HONEYMOON

I’m 32 and he’s 37. Our sons are four and two.

When he returned from his “work trip” he blamed me for his cheating, saying I had let myself go and didn’t pay him enough attention.

He then told me he’d “traded up” for a better model. It didn’t stop there.

He said that his wife, who is 27, is absolutely stunning and makes him feel special.

Apparently this woman was a barmaid he’d met on a golf trip and they had been seeing each other for six months.

He told me all this, then marched upstairs and packed his games console and his clothes and drove off out of my life.

The thing is, we always talked about getting married but when we had kids there always seemed something better to spend our money on.

Mutual friends have told me he has moved into a new-build home on the other side of our small town and his wife has plenty of family money.

My sons are really missing him and I don’t even know how I feel.

Sometimes when he comes to visit the boys I beg him to come home.

But other times I’m so angry with him, I refuse to let him in.

Now he is accusing me of stopping him from seeing his children.

Get in touch with Deidre

Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.

Send an email to deardeidre@the-sun.co.uk

You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.

Surely he can’t just show up when he likes?

I’m a mess and need to start getting a grip for the kids’ sake.

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DEIDRE SAYS: I’m so sorry your partner ended your relationship in such a cruel way.

This man sounds selfish and immature, and quite frankly the way he has treated you is emotionally abusive.

It won’t feel like it now, but you really are better off without him.

He is behaving like he still lives in your home, by just turning up unannounced.

Tell him firmly that you would encourage a good relationship between him and your sons but he can only collect them with prior arrangement.

Start to put down your boundaries.

I’m sending you my support pack When Parents Fall Out, which you could pass to him to help explain why you need to co-operate for the future wellbeing of your children.

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Give yourself time and be kind to yourself. He put you down constantly, now you can start to build up your confidence.

I’d recommend seeing a counsellor to help you with this betrayal and am sending you my Counselling support pack.

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