You won’t believe what your sex fantasy really means – from sleeping with a colleague to doing it outside Comments Off on You won’t believe what your sex fantasy really means – from sleeping with a colleague to doing it outside 364

WHAT do you lie back and think of?

According to a recent survey, during sex a whopping 40 per cent of men are most likely to fantasise about sleeping with a colleague, while a quarter of women dream about getting dirty . . . with household chores.

GettyWe decode your deepest desires[/caption]

But what do our thoughts during the height of passion really mean?

Here, leading sexpert KATE TAYLOR decodes our deepest desires.

You’re an adrenaline junkie

BDSM activities such as spanking and bondage go way beyond power-play.

A 2014 study found being dominated in bed affects blood flow to the brain and releases powerful endorphins that create an “altered state” of consciousness, similar to a runner’s high.

You’re likely to be a thrill-seeker in all areas of your life, and you seek out new experiences. A tendency to get bored easily can draw people to dominant partners.

You want to boss the boardroom

A STUDY revealed that the number of men and women who fantasise about dominating a partner is broadly equal, with 59 per cent of men and 46 per cent of women dreaming of taking the reins (or the whip!).

You’re likely to be interested in control in all areas of your life — and you’ll like Succession on TV.

You know how to fake it

GettyIf you daydream about chores then you’ve either binge-watched too much Mrs Hinch or you are finding sex dull[/caption]

IF your mind wanders to the cleaning cupboard while your partner is giving you their all, you’ve either binge-watched too much Mrs Hinch or you are finding sex dull.

It may not be your lover’s fault. It could be you’ve never revealed what you really want, so sex has become something you do for them.

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You might even have resigned yourself to faking it — a 2019 study found shy women would rather fake orgasms than open up about their real desires in the bedroom.

You spend too much time on Zoom

HAVING sexy thoughts about a colleague is normal — especially if you’ve been working too hard.

Spending 40-plus hours a week with anyone can leave you either liking them or hating them. Either way, you’re thinking about them.

Research discovered the more often you look at a face, the more attractive you’ll find it. So if you’re falling for a colleague, consider swapping face-to-face meetings or Zoom chats for old-fashioned phone calls.

You miss your youth

WHEN you find yourself taking a steamy stroll down memory lane, you are probably not actually missing your ex. It’s more likely you are feeling wistful about a certain period of your life.

For example, if you fantasise about your most recent ex, you might be feeling vulnerable about dating and missing security. If your mind drifts back to your very first love, you could be feeling nostalgic about your youth and younger self.

Take these fantasies as a sign you are not totally happy with your current situation and shake things up.

You’re a good laugh

GettyIf you’re fantasising about having sex with multiple people at once, say in an orgy, chances are you’re highly extroverted[/caption]

IF you are fantasising about having sex with multiple people at different times, it might be you’re looking for validation or confirmation of your self-worth from an outside source.

But if you’re fantasising about having sex with multiple people at once, say in an orgy, chances are you’re highly extroverted. Other signs will be that you’re talkative and have a good sense of humour.

You need to take sex into your own hands (literally)

ACCORDING to social psychologists, same-sex fantasies are much more common in women than men.

But whether you’re a guy or a girl, they can signify that you haven’t embraced your own sexuality yet.

A same-sex stand-in represents you and all your sexiness, and is an imaginary way to explore yourself.

The takeaway? See this fantasy as a sign that you need to celebrate your body, desires and sex drive. Try a weekend of “self care”.

You worry too much about what other people think

FRUSTRATIONS you feel in everyday life can often show up in your naughty daydreams.

So when you fantasise about indulging in full view of the world, it’s a clue you’ve been spending too much time worrying about what people think of you.

The flip side of this fantasy is voyeurism — watching someone else without their knowledge. A study found 54 per cent of men fantasise about watching someone in secret. That can reveal a need for power.

You’re a people pleaser

GettyYou’re most likely to dream of sex with a stranger if you are a people-pleaser who puts a partner’s needs first[/caption]

SEX with a stranger can help a person focus on experimentation. It can take away feelings of inhibition, allowing you to play out your desires without judgment.

You’re most likely to dream of sex with a stranger if you are a people-pleaser who puts a partner’s needs first. It might be your wake-up call that you need to be more selfish between the sheets.

You have a fear of abandonment

THE more perfect your sexual fantasies, the more of a worrier you might be in your relationship. A research study tracked 48 couples’ sexual fantasies over three weeks.

It found that participants with an anxious attachment style — meaning they felt fearful when in a relationship — tended to fantasise mostly about sexual encounters that included plenty of perfection and intimacy, especially if the relationship was tense or they had argued

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Managing Relationships While Working in the Adult Industry Comments Off on Managing Relationships While Working in the Adult Industry 278

Navigating romantic relationships can be complex, and this complexity often intensifies when one or both partners are involved in the adult industry. In this guide, we’ll explore practical strategies for maintaining healthy relationships, fostering open communication, and addressing challenges that may arise when one’s profession involves adult entertainment.

1. Open Communication:

Communication is the foundation of any healthy relationship, especially when working in the adult industry. Establishing open and honest communication channels helps build trust and understanding between partners.

Example: Provide communication tips, such as setting aside dedicated time for discussions, creating a judgment-free zone, and actively listening to each other’s concerns.

2. Establishing Boundaries:

Clearly defining and respecting boundaries is crucial for both partners. Discussing comfort levels, expectations, and limits ensures that both individuals feel secure in the relationship.

Example: Offer guidance on how to have constructive conversations about boundaries, emphasizing the importance of mutual consent and compromise.

3. Building a Support System:

Developing a robust support system is essential. This includes friends, family, or colleagues who understand and respect the nature of the profession and can offer support during challenging times.

Example: Share stories of couples who have successfully built strong support systems and provide tips on how to nurture these networks.

4. Trust and Transparency:

Trust is a cornerstone of any relationship but becomes even more critical when working in the adult industry. Being transparent about one’s work and addressing concerns promptly helps foster trust between partners.

Example: Illustrate the positive outcomes of trust-building actions, such as being open about work schedules, discussing potential challenges, and offering reassurance.

5. Educating Partners:

Sometimes, misunderstandings arise due to lack of knowledge. Educating partners about the adult industry, its dynamics, and dispelling common myths can promote a better understanding of the profession.

Example: Create a guide for individuals to share with their partners, explaining the realities of the adult industry, emphasizing the consensual nature of the work, and addressing misconceptions.

6. Coping with External Judgments:

Working in the adult industry often comes with societal stigma. Discuss strategies for coping with external judgments and maintaining a strong sense of self-worth within the relationship.

Example: Share empowering stories of individuals who have successfully navigated societal stigma, emphasizing self-love and resilience.

7. Seeking Professional Guidance:

Relationships can benefit from professional guidance. Encouraging couples to seek counseling or therapy when faced with challenges can provide a neutral space for communication and support.

Example: Highlight success stories of couples who have sought therapy to strengthen their relationship and provide resources for finding qualified professionals.

8. Planning for the Future:

Discussing future plans is vital for any couple. Addressing long-term goals, such as career transitions or family planning, helps both partners feel secure and invested in the relationship.

Example: Offer advice on creating a shared vision for the future, navigating career changes, and making joint decisions that align with both partners’ aspirations.


Successfully managing relationships while working in the adult industry requires a combination of open communication, trust-building, and a proactive approach to addressing challenges. By fostering understanding, establishing clear boundaries, and seeking support when needed, couples can build strong, resilient relationships that thrive despite the unique demands of the profession. Remember, every relationship is unique, and adapting these strategies to suit individual needs is key to a fulfilling and supportive partnership.

Understanding and Navigating the World of Online Adult Content Comments Off on Understanding and Navigating the World of Online Adult Content 263

The internet has transformed the way we access and consume information, including adult content. Navigating this vast and often complex digital landscape requires understanding, responsibility, and respect. In this guide, we’ll explore key aspects of online adult content, helping you make informed choices while ensuring a safe and enjoyable experience.

1. Diverse Platforms and Formats:

Online adult content is not confined to a single platform or format. From websites and streaming services to interactive content, understanding the variety available is essential.

Example: Differentiate between mainstream adult websites, premium subscription services, and emerging interactive platforms, providing a glimpse into the diverse options.

2. Privacy and Security:

Respecting privacy is crucial when engaging with adult content online. This includes understanding the importance of secure connections, anonymous browsing, and being mindful of personal data.

Example: Provide tips on using virtual private networks (VPNs), secure payment methods, and the importance of reading privacy policies on adult websites.

3. Responsible Consumption:

Consuming adult content responsibly involves being aware of ethical considerations. This includes consent, avoiding illegal content, and understanding the potential impact on relationships.

Example: Share stories or case studies illustrating the importance of responsible consumption and the potential consequences of engaging with non-consensual or illegal content.

4. Age Verification and Restrictions:

Most countries have regulations regarding the access to adult content, often requiring age verification. Understanding and complying with these regulations is vital for legal and ethical reasons.

Example: Provide a step-by-step guide on age verification processes on different platforms and emphasize the importance of adherence to legal requirements.

5. Impact on Mental Health:

Consuming adult content can have varying effects on mental health. It’s crucial to be aware of the potential impact and seek support if needed.

Example: Discuss the potential consequences of excessive consumption, addiction, or unrealistic expectations, and provide resources for mental health support.

6. Consent and Ethical Production:

Understanding the concept of consent extends to the production of adult content. Ethical consumption involves supporting platforms and creators that prioritize the well-being and consent of performers.

Example: Showcase initiatives or platforms that prioritize ethical production, emphasize performer rights, and provide fair compensation.

7. Balancing Fantasies with Reality:

Distinguishing between fantasy and reality is important when consuming adult content. Developing a healthy perspective on sexuality involves recognizing the difference between scripted entertainment and real-life relationships.

Example: Share anecdotes or expert opinions on how to maintain a balanced view of sexuality and relationships while consuming adult content.

8. Community and Education:

Online communities and educational resources play a role in promoting healthy discussions about adult content. Engaging with like-minded individuals and staying informed contributes to a positive online experience.

Example: Highlight reputable online forums or educational platforms where individuals can learn more about various aspects of adult content, share experiences, and ask questions.


Navigating the world of online adult content requires a balanced approach, combining awareness, responsibility, and respect. By understanding the diverse landscape, prioritizing privacy and security, and promoting ethical consumption, individuals can ensure a positive and consensual online experience. Remember, responsible engagement contributes to a healthier digital environment for both consumers and content creators alike.

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