People are only just realising why so many men fall asleep after sex 0 92

PICTURE this, you’ve just had a great session beneath the sheets and then you hear a snoring sound.

If this is familiar then you’re not alone – as many men fall asleep after having sex.

GettyIf your partner keeps falling to sleep after sex then it might not actually be down to poor bedside manner, experts say[/caption]

But before you start berating your boyfriend for his bedside manner, there is actually a scientific reason for his immediate snoozing.

In both men and women sexual stimulation has been proven to boost brain activity.

When we have sex we tend to be relaxed and in turn, we release a lot of stress and anxiety that may have been building up throughout the day.

Research using positron emission tomography (PET) scans has previously proven this – and it’s known that when we are relaxed and have released stress, it’s easier to fall to sleep.

But when looking at why men seem to fall asleep faster, it’s actually due to a cocktail of chemicals released when they ejaculate.

These include norepinephrine, serotonin, oxytocin, vasopressin, nitric oxide (NO), and the hormone prolactin.

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It’s the release of prolactin that makes a particular difference as this is linked to the feeling of sexual satisfaction, experts say.

It also help mediate the recovery time, in other words, how long a man has to wait before going in for round two.

Men deficient in this hormone can sometimes also have faster recovery times.

Experts at New York University’s Science, Health and Environmental Reporting Program explained: “Prolactin levels are naturally higher during sleep, and animals injected with the chemical become tired immediately.

“This suggests a strong link between prolactin and sleep, so it’s likely that the hormone’s release during orgasm causes men to feel sleepy.

“Prolactin also explains why men are sleepier after intercourse than after masturbation.

“For unknown reasons, intercourse orgasms release four times more prolactin than masturbatory orgasms”.

IMPROVED SLEEP

Two other chemicals released during sex include Oxytocin and vasopressin.

The release of them usually accompanies melatonin – which regulates our body clocks.

Oxytocin has also been proven to reduce stress levels which could lead to sleepiness and relaxation.

Max Kirsten resident sleep expert at Innermost Innermost and The Sleep Coach said having sex also actually improves our sleep quality after the event.

He explained: “We release an important intimacy hormone called oxytocin, which naturally reduces our stress cortisol levels dramatically. 

“Having an orgasm will help you fall asleep because it releases the hormone prolactin that makes you feel relaxed and very sleepy.”

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My bitter ex told lies to my friends about my ‘small manhood’ after I dumped her 0 40

DEAR DEIDRE: MY ex is so bitter about being dumped that she is spreading nasty rumours around our friendship group – saying I’m rubbish in bed and have a small todger.

She never complained when we were together, but last week she told the girls in our group that being with me was “like kissing a soggy lettuce leaf” and that she “literally didn’t feel a thing when we were having sex” because I’m so small.

My ex is so bitter about being dumped that she is spreading nasty rumours around our friendship group – saying I’m rubbish in bed and have a small todger

I’m 25 and she’s 24. I think part of it is jealousy.

She knows a couple of the other girls fancy me and I think she’s trying to sabotage any chance I have with them.

Not that I’m even planning anything.

She’s so insecure and has a vicious tongue on her.

I’m tempted to let each of her so-called friends know what she really says about them in private.

Even her best friend gets a nasty critique every time she posts anything on Instagram.

Get in touch with Deidre

Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.

Send an email to deardeidre@the-sun.co.uk

You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.

Her top is either too short, or her hair looks like wire, or her laugh is fake . . . it goes on and on.

I don’t regret splitting up with her but this last trick has really infuriated me.

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DEIDRE SAYS: Don’t let yourself stoop to her level.

You can make it clear she is lying without playing her game, which would only escalate tensions and reflect badly on you.

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You could maybe reply with: “Let’s just say she never complained when we were together and nor have any of my other exes.”

Your friends will soon see her behaviour for what it is – jealous insecurity.

My partner said he was on a work trip – but he was actually getting married and on his honeymoon 0 28

DEAR DEIDRE: MY partner said he was on a work trip two months ago, but he had actually got married and been on honeymoon.

Our relationship had become a bit predictable, but we still had regular sex and nice days out with our two young sons.

My partner lied about his work trip – he was really on his HONEYMOON

I’m 32 and he’s 37. Our sons are four and two.

When he returned from his “work trip” he blamed me for his cheating, saying I had let myself go and didn’t pay him enough attention.

He then told me he’d “traded up” for a better model. It didn’t stop there.

He said that his wife, who is 27, is absolutely stunning and makes him feel special.

Apparently this woman was a barmaid he’d met on a golf trip and they had been seeing each other for six months.

He told me all this, then marched upstairs and packed his games console and his clothes and drove off out of my life.

The thing is, we always talked about getting married but when we had kids there always seemed something better to spend our money on.

Mutual friends have told me he has moved into a new-build home on the other side of our small town and his wife has plenty of family money.

My sons are really missing him and I don’t even know how I feel.

Sometimes when he comes to visit the boys I beg him to come home.

But other times I’m so angry with him, I refuse to let him in.

Now he is accusing me of stopping him from seeing his children.

Get in touch with Deidre

Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.

Send an email to deardeidre@the-sun.co.uk

You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.

Surely he can’t just show up when he likes?

I’m a mess and need to start getting a grip for the kids’ sake.

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DEAR DEIDRE

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DEIDRE SAYS: I’m so sorry your partner ended your relationship in such a cruel way.

This man sounds selfish and immature, and quite frankly the way he has treated you is emotionally abusive.

It won’t feel like it now, but you really are better off without him.

He is behaving like he still lives in your home, by just turning up unannounced.

Tell him firmly that you would encourage a good relationship between him and your sons but he can only collect them with prior arrangement.

Start to put down your boundaries.

I’m sending you my support pack When Parents Fall Out, which you could pass to him to help explain why you need to co-operate for the future wellbeing of your children.

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Give yourself time and be kind to yourself. He put you down constantly, now you can start to build up your confidence.

I’d recommend seeing a counsellor to help you with this betrayal and am sending you my Counselling support pack.

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