I’ve been trolled for my sex life & s**t-shamed since school but I’ll never stop being open, says Megan Barton-Hanson 0 321

SOCIETY has such a weird relationship with women who are openly sexual.

There’s one rule for men, who are celebrated for being a “lad”, but if a woman says she enjoys sex, even if it’s with her partner, it’s shameful.

Megan says: ‘I remember after my first time having sex, when I was 17, I was like: What on earth was that? because in movies women are screaming and having the best time’ Megan says: ‘As Brits we’re so prudish and awkward, but my mum has always been open, so I’ve always told her most things’

Although I think it’s slowly getting better, it’s still so backwards.

My passion for talking about sex stems from something that happened at school.

When I was in year eight, an older boy in year 11 asked me to send him an explicit video, and I wouldn’t.

He said: “I bet you haven’t even masturbated, you’re so young,” and I replied: “Yes I have.”

For the rest of my school life, I had older kids bullying me, because this boy spread rumours that I was “the girl who fingers herself”.

I carried that slut-shaming around for years. 

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I couldn’t tell my mum, because back then I hadn’t heard of anybody who spoke about pleasuring themselves. 

Since then I’ve had therapy on and off and that helped me deal with it, but then when I finished series four of Love Island in 2018, I faced more slut-shaming because of my career – the fact that I had worked in the sex industry as a dancer since the age of 20.

Old-fashioned people might think it’s sleazy, but I think it’s one of the bravest things you can do, because people are so judgemental still. 

I also got a lot of hate and trolling for the fact that I slept with two boys on the show [Wes Nelson and Eyal Booker], but so many male contestants have done the same, if not slept with more girls in that eight-week period!

That brought up all my old feelings of shame again.

I was so confused, because my social circle before Love Island was all dancers and glamour models – and it was normal for us to discuss sex and women pleasuring themselves.

After that, I thought: “I need to speak out,” and my podcast You Come First, about prioritising ourselves in relationships and sex, snowballed from there. 

When you’re at school you get taught about your period, and how not to get pregnant or catch STIs, but you don’t ever get taught about women’s pleasure, and I think it’s so important for girls to know their own body before they become sexually active with a partner.

I remember after my first time having sex, when I was 17, I was like: “What on earth was that?” because in movies women are screaming and having the best time.

I think you’ve just got to be in tune with yourself and be able to communicate with your partner.

I remember after my first time having sex, when I was 17, I was like: ‘What on earth was that?’ because in movies women are screaming and having the best time.

Megan Barton-Hanson

I don’t say: “You’re awful,” I’ll just softly hint. But also, as I’ve got older, it’s become much deeper, and I can only have great sex with someone if I’ve got a really good mental connection with them. 

Older generations have really shied away from talking about sex.

As Brits we’re so prudish and awkward, but my mum has always been open, so I’ve always told her most things.

I think she’s just proud and supportive of me because her friends and their daughters say that it’s amazing that I speak out about things.

Now my Instagram DMs are filled with so many men and women of all different ages asking me for advice – from people who are coming out, to women who are just divorced and want to explore their sexuality.

Sometimes I think if only there had been someone like me or [model] Amber Rose [who regularly shares details of her sex life] or Lily Allen – who’s brought out a sex toy – when I was growing up, it would have taken the edge off the bullying.

But all of those years have motivated me to use my platform for good, rather than just promoting teeth whitening and hair extensions.

I’m single and living my best life, but I’m definitely open if someone comes along and brings something to the table.

For now, I’m going to focus on travelling and being the best version of myself. 

  • Watch Megan on Ex On The Beach, Tuesday, 10pm, MTV. 

InstagramMegan says: ‘I’m single and living my best life, but I’m definitely open if someone comes along and brings something to the table’[/caption] InstagramMegan says: ‘Older generations have really shied away from talking about sex’[/caption]

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Managing Relationships While Working in the Adult Industry 0 130

Navigating romantic relationships can be complex, and this complexity often intensifies when one or both partners are involved in the adult industry. In this guide, we’ll explore practical strategies for maintaining healthy relationships, fostering open communication, and addressing challenges that may arise when one’s profession involves adult entertainment.

1. Open Communication:

Communication is the foundation of any healthy relationship, especially when working in the adult industry. Establishing open and honest communication channels helps build trust and understanding between partners.

Example: Provide communication tips, such as setting aside dedicated time for discussions, creating a judgment-free zone, and actively listening to each other’s concerns.

2. Establishing Boundaries:

Clearly defining and respecting boundaries is crucial for both partners. Discussing comfort levels, expectations, and limits ensures that both individuals feel secure in the relationship.

Example: Offer guidance on how to have constructive conversations about boundaries, emphasizing the importance of mutual consent and compromise.

3. Building a Support System:

Developing a robust support system is essential. This includes friends, family, or colleagues who understand and respect the nature of the profession and can offer support during challenging times.

Example: Share stories of couples who have successfully built strong support systems and provide tips on how to nurture these networks.

4. Trust and Transparency:

Trust is a cornerstone of any relationship but becomes even more critical when working in the adult industry. Being transparent about one’s work and addressing concerns promptly helps foster trust between partners.

Example: Illustrate the positive outcomes of trust-building actions, such as being open about work schedules, discussing potential challenges, and offering reassurance.

5. Educating Partners:

Sometimes, misunderstandings arise due to lack of knowledge. Educating partners about the adult industry, its dynamics, and dispelling common myths can promote a better understanding of the profession.

Example: Create a guide for individuals to share with their partners, explaining the realities of the adult industry, emphasizing the consensual nature of the work, and addressing misconceptions.

6. Coping with External Judgments:

Working in the adult industry often comes with societal stigma. Discuss strategies for coping with external judgments and maintaining a strong sense of self-worth within the relationship.

Example: Share empowering stories of individuals who have successfully navigated societal stigma, emphasizing self-love and resilience.

7. Seeking Professional Guidance:

Relationships can benefit from professional guidance. Encouraging couples to seek counseling or therapy when faced with challenges can provide a neutral space for communication and support.

Example: Highlight success stories of couples who have sought therapy to strengthen their relationship and provide resources for finding qualified professionals.

8. Planning for the Future:

Discussing future plans is vital for any couple. Addressing long-term goals, such as career transitions or family planning, helps both partners feel secure and invested in the relationship.

Example: Offer advice on creating a shared vision for the future, navigating career changes, and making joint decisions that align with both partners’ aspirations.

Conclusion:

Successfully managing relationships while working in the adult industry requires a combination of open communication, trust-building, and a proactive approach to addressing challenges. By fostering understanding, establishing clear boundaries, and seeking support when needed, couples can build strong, resilient relationships that thrive despite the unique demands of the profession. Remember, every relationship is unique, and adapting these strategies to suit individual needs is key to a fulfilling and supportive partnership.

Understanding and Navigating the World of Online Adult Content 0 139

The internet has transformed the way we access and consume information, including adult content. Navigating this vast and often complex digital landscape requires understanding, responsibility, and respect. In this guide, we’ll explore key aspects of online adult content, helping you make informed choices while ensuring a safe and enjoyable experience.

1. Diverse Platforms and Formats:

Online adult content is not confined to a single platform or format. From websites and streaming services to interactive content, understanding the variety available is essential.

Example: Differentiate between mainstream adult websites, premium subscription services, and emerging interactive platforms, providing a glimpse into the diverse options.

2. Privacy and Security:

Respecting privacy is crucial when engaging with adult content online. This includes understanding the importance of secure connections, anonymous browsing, and being mindful of personal data.

Example: Provide tips on using virtual private networks (VPNs), secure payment methods, and the importance of reading privacy policies on adult websites.

3. Responsible Consumption:

Consuming adult content responsibly involves being aware of ethical considerations. This includes consent, avoiding illegal content, and understanding the potential impact on relationships.

Example: Share stories or case studies illustrating the importance of responsible consumption and the potential consequences of engaging with non-consensual or illegal content.

4. Age Verification and Restrictions:

Most countries have regulations regarding the access to adult content, often requiring age verification. Understanding and complying with these regulations is vital for legal and ethical reasons.

Example: Provide a step-by-step guide on age verification processes on different platforms and emphasize the importance of adherence to legal requirements.

5. Impact on Mental Health:

Consuming adult content can have varying effects on mental health. It’s crucial to be aware of the potential impact and seek support if needed.

Example: Discuss the potential consequences of excessive consumption, addiction, or unrealistic expectations, and provide resources for mental health support.

6. Consent and Ethical Production:

Understanding the concept of consent extends to the production of adult content. Ethical consumption involves supporting platforms and creators that prioritize the well-being and consent of performers.

Example: Showcase initiatives or platforms that prioritize ethical production, emphasize performer rights, and provide fair compensation.

7. Balancing Fantasies with Reality:

Distinguishing between fantasy and reality is important when consuming adult content. Developing a healthy perspective on sexuality involves recognizing the difference between scripted entertainment and real-life relationships.

Example: Share anecdotes or expert opinions on how to maintain a balanced view of sexuality and relationships while consuming adult content.

8. Community and Education:

Online communities and educational resources play a role in promoting healthy discussions about adult content. Engaging with like-minded individuals and staying informed contributes to a positive online experience.

Example: Highlight reputable online forums or educational platforms where individuals can learn more about various aspects of adult content, share experiences, and ask questions.

Conclusion:

Navigating the world of online adult content requires a balanced approach, combining awareness, responsibility, and respect. By understanding the diverse landscape, prioritizing privacy and security, and promoting ethical consumption, individuals can ensure a positive and consensual online experience. Remember, responsible engagement contributes to a healthier digital environment for both consumers and content creators alike.

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