DEAR DEIDRE: AFTER my husband of 35 years died, I was so lonely that I started sleeping with strangers who I met online.
But I hated the woman I’d become.
Sex with strangers made me feel wanted for a short time – then I’d feel used
I wrote to you, in desperation. At 60 years old, I didn’t want to be alone for the rest of my life.
Sex with strangers made me feel wanted for a short time.
Afterwards, I felt empty and used.
You explained that I’d developed a type of sex addiction to cover up my unhappiness and loneliness, and sent me your support pack about this, as well as packs on Feeling Lonely and Widening Your Social Scene, to help me find real companionship.
You also recommended grief counselling and suggested I contact thegoodgrieftrust.org, a central hub for bereavement.
I have since stopped having empty sex and I’ve confided my feelings in a close friend.
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I’ve also started volunteering at a local hospital and am spending more time with my children.
Thank you for not judging me and for making me see life could be fulfilling again.
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DEIDRE SAYS: Volunteering is a wonderful way to meet people and do some good.
I’m so glad life is better for you and that you’ve learned to value yourself again.
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