I suggested an open marriage to my husband to spice up our sex life – he then fell for his lover and I was heartbroken 0 78

AS Channel 4’s new show Open House: The Great Sex Experiment shocks viewers, wife Samantha Pressdee, 39, reveals what happened when she suggested sleeping with other people…

“AFTER nine months of marriage, I could not help feeling there was something missing from my relationship. 

Samantha Pressdee, 39, reveals what happened when she suggested sleeping with other peoplePaul Tonge – The Sun Samantha PressdeeSamantha says she would never entertain another open relationship, after being left scarred by her experience with Louis[/caption] Samantha with Louis on their wedding daySamantha Pressdee

My husband Louis Ntritsos had moved from Greece to London to live with me — and this is when the cracks started to show.

Up until then we had enjoyed a long-distance relationship for four years. But now we were arguing about everything from money to work and our sex life dwindled.

I felt suffocated and missed the excitement you get from new love. 

Restless and bored, I brought up the idea of an open relationship.

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Naively, I believed “free love” could reignite our relationship. Louis was terrified that if I started sleeping with another man I would prefer him. But he reluctantly agreed. 

I reasoned that having an open marriage would be better than cheating on one another.

It was a few months later when I went on my first date — with a former flame. As I slipped into my little black dress I could see the panic spread on Louis’ face. 

Planting kisses on him, I told him not to worry and that I loved him and would always be his. 

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Around this time — about a year into our marriage — Louis moved back to Greece to work as a sports instructor for the summer. We agreed I would visit regularly. 

Our open marriage rules were simple: Always be honest with one another. 

So, when I slept with my ex I called him straight away. 

 I imagined him on the beach chatting up girls in bikinis. But he said he wasn’t interested in cheating and didn’t want other women.

So our “open relationship” was in reality one-sided. Louis hated thinking of me with other men. But even though he was crazy with jealousy he didn’t ask for a divorce. 

He just became more miserable and couldn’t get over the fact I’d slept with another man.

I confessed I still had feelings for my ex and we’d grown close, which made him feel more insecure. He couldn’t understand how I could love two men at the same time.

Although he admitted to kissing other women, he told me he’d never had sex with them. 

But the tables turned when I found out that he had been sleeping with someone else, too. 

A friend showed me a loved-up photo of him. He was forced to come clean — and I was heartbroken. 

Yes, it was my idea to have an open relationship but I felt betrayed because he had lied and hidden it from me. It went against the rules. I felt humiliated. 

We separated for two years, remaining friends, but the trust was lost. Then in 2017, I went on holiday to Rhodes and we rekindled our love. 

Due to the long distance, we tried an open relationship again. But this time I made it clear there were to be no secret girlfriends. 

He agreed and for the first time in years I felt hopeful about our future. We were planning on having a baby, even.

But my happiness was crushed when one year into our reunion I found out he’d been sleeping with another British girl. 

What’s more, she didn’t respect the idea of a polyamorous marriage and wanted us to break up. She was also in a relationship and her boyfriend didn’t know about the affair. 

Unbeknown to me, she had been flying from Manchester to Greece to see Louis. I was furious.

I made him show me all of the messages they had exchanged. As I scrolled through them, I felt sick.

Not only had they been secretly seeing each other for the best part of two years but he’d told her he was in love with her and they were planning to stay together — in a monogamous relationship. 

Furious, I filed for divorce. How could he be trying for a baby with me when he was planning a future with her? We have remained good friends but our divorce was finalised in December 2019. 

It felt like a new beginning.

Now I’m living in Willenhall, West Mids, and working as a comedian.

I’m single and dating. But I’d never entertain an open relationship again. The experience has scarred me. 

I only want one man now and I hope I’ll be enough for him.

For those thinking of an open relationship, my message is, think twice. I blame myself for my husband’s infidelity.

Love isn’t about rules, it’s about honesty and respect. The love between two people is precious — and so easy to destroy.

Louis, 37, from Kos, Greece, says: “It was hard when Samantha asked me for an open relationship. I was afraid of losing her and wanted her to be happy. 

“But she told me it would make us stronger. In the end I agreed but deep down I was worried. 

“When I watched her get ready for her first date I felt very jealous. It was crazy and I didn’t want to know what they got up to. 

“I didn’t see any other women for the first year. Then I met this girl and we started sleeping together. Samantha thinks I cheated on her but I thought I was just doing what she wanted. 

“But she told me I was doing it the wrong way because I didn’t tell her. I didn’t tell her anything because I thought I was protecting her. I was trying to be a gentleman by sparing her the details. 

“We broke up for two years and in that time I saw other women. Then when we got back together Samantha told me she wanted an open relationship again. But I should have been honest that I was seeing another woman.

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“I’m sorry for hurting her, I hated seeing her upset. Samantha is the love of my life. I still love her and will always love her.

“I’d never have an open relationship again. I still don’t understand it. I was never trying to cheat on her, I just didn’t understand the rules.”

Samantha is living in Willenhall, West Mids, and working as a comedianPaul Tonge – The Sun

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My bitter ex told lies to my friends about my ‘small manhood’ after I dumped her 0 47

DEAR DEIDRE: MY ex is so bitter about being dumped that she is spreading nasty rumours around our friendship group – saying I’m rubbish in bed and have a small todger.

She never complained when we were together, but last week she told the girls in our group that being with me was “like kissing a soggy lettuce leaf” and that she “literally didn’t feel a thing when we were having sex” because I’m so small.

My ex is so bitter about being dumped that she is spreading nasty rumours around our friendship group – saying I’m rubbish in bed and have a small todger

I’m 25 and she’s 24. I think part of it is jealousy.

She knows a couple of the other girls fancy me and I think she’s trying to sabotage any chance I have with them.

Not that I’m even planning anything.

She’s so insecure and has a vicious tongue on her.

I’m tempted to let each of her so-called friends know what she really says about them in private.

Even her best friend gets a nasty critique every time she posts anything on Instagram.

Get in touch with Deidre

Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.

Send an email to deardeidre@the-sun.co.uk

You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.

Her top is either too short, or her hair looks like wire, or her laugh is fake . . . it goes on and on.

I don’t regret splitting up with her but this last trick has really infuriated me.

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DEIDRE SAYS: Don’t let yourself stoop to her level.

You can make it clear she is lying without playing her game, which would only escalate tensions and reflect badly on you.

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You could maybe reply with: “Let’s just say she never complained when we were together and nor have any of my other exes.”

Your friends will soon see her behaviour for what it is – jealous insecurity.

My partner said he was on a work trip – but he was actually getting married and on his honeymoon 0 30

DEAR DEIDRE: MY partner said he was on a work trip two months ago, but he had actually got married and been on honeymoon.

Our relationship had become a bit predictable, but we still had regular sex and nice days out with our two young sons.

My partner lied about his work trip – he was really on his HONEYMOON

I’m 32 and he’s 37. Our sons are four and two.

When he returned from his “work trip” he blamed me for his cheating, saying I had let myself go and didn’t pay him enough attention.

He then told me he’d “traded up” for a better model. It didn’t stop there.

He said that his wife, who is 27, is absolutely stunning and makes him feel special.

Apparently this woman was a barmaid he’d met on a golf trip and they had been seeing each other for six months.

He told me all this, then marched upstairs and packed his games console and his clothes and drove off out of my life.

The thing is, we always talked about getting married but when we had kids there always seemed something better to spend our money on.

Mutual friends have told me he has moved into a new-build home on the other side of our small town and his wife has plenty of family money.

My sons are really missing him and I don’t even know how I feel.

Sometimes when he comes to visit the boys I beg him to come home.

But other times I’m so angry with him, I refuse to let him in.

Now he is accusing me of stopping him from seeing his children.

Get in touch with Deidre

Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.

Send an email to deardeidre@the-sun.co.uk

You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.

Surely he can’t just show up when he likes?

I’m a mess and need to start getting a grip for the kids’ sake.

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DEIDRE SAYS: I’m so sorry your partner ended your relationship in such a cruel way.

This man sounds selfish and immature, and quite frankly the way he has treated you is emotionally abusive.

It won’t feel like it now, but you really are better off without him.

He is behaving like he still lives in your home, by just turning up unannounced.

Tell him firmly that you would encourage a good relationship between him and your sons but he can only collect them with prior arrangement.

Start to put down your boundaries.

I’m sending you my support pack When Parents Fall Out, which you could pass to him to help explain why you need to co-operate for the future wellbeing of your children.

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Give yourself time and be kind to yourself. He put you down constantly, now you can start to build up your confidence.

I’d recommend seeing a counsellor to help you with this betrayal and am sending you my Counselling support pack.

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