SIGNING her name beside her partner’s, Irie Ewers felt a rush of excitement.
This was no ordinary contract – it was an agreement between her and boyfriend Tom Smith, 32, granting them permission to have sex with other people.
HotSpot MediaIrie Ewers and Tom Smith opened up their relationship[/caption] HotSpot MediaThe couple called off their engagement because they couldn’t imagine leaving their girlfriend out[/caption]
The couple, who met on dating app Tinder in September 2015, agreed to open up their relationship after Irie, 26, admitted she was bisexual.
Flash forward three years and the polyamorous pair are now a throuple, having found a connection with another woman, Alex Jones, 32.
And they’ve even called off their engagement because they couldn’t imagine getting married without Alex.
Law student Irie, from Oklahoma, says: “I feel lucky to have not one, but two people to love and cherish.
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“I didn’t think it’d be possible to love more than one person at a time, but with Tom and Alex, it’s so natural.”
After sparks flew on their first date, Irie and Tom, a recruiter, fell madly in love.
They moved in together in May 2016 and were “strictly monogamous” – but two years later, they decided to open up their partnership.
Irie explains: “From the beginning, Tom always knew I was also attracted to women, so when we discussed exploring our sexuality, swinging seemed like the obvious choice.
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“We wrote up a contract, outlining dos and don’ts, so there were no grey areas with consent.
“After that we slept with other people and enjoyed threesomes. It was great sex.
“Although we enjoyed a few flings, we wanted something more permanent.”
HotSpot MediaIrie and Tom started out monogamous but Irie knew she was bisexual[/caption]
Irie and Tom discussed inviting a third partner into their relationship, and in September 2019, they decided to write out a contract.
The agreement included a two drink limit before engaging in sex, and that Irie kissed the woman first.
Irie says: “The contract stated we’d now become polyamorous and it laid out the ground rules.
“It said we were happy to bring another woman into our relationship. If we were to have sex there would be a two drink limit.
Our contract said we were happy to bring another woman into our relationship. If we were to have sex there would be a two drink limit
“Tom and I then signed it. It was very exciting.”
They began dating women, but had no luck – and in July 2020 they got engaged.
But everything changed in January 2021 when they met Alex, a psychotherapist, at a restaurant while having brunch.
Irie recalls: “She was beautiful. I chatted with her at the end of the table while Tom watched.
“I learnt that Alex was a lesbian but had never explored polyamory.
“After the brunch I introduced her to Tom and told her we were a couple but were open to meeting a new woman. She was monogamous but interested.
“After that we chatted every day, and when we met for a hike later that week, we confessed our feelings for each other.”
Couple to trio
HotSpot MediaThe trio moved in together and began sharing a bed[/caption]
In March last year, Alex joined Tom and Irie in their relationship, becoming a polyamorous trio.
Although Alex is a lesbian, she went on ‘dates’ with Tom so they could build their connection.
Irie says: “Tom, Alex and I started sharing a bed together and eventually all became intimate as a trio and it was magical.
“Everything happened so naturally and I found myself falling in love with Alex too.”
Alex later moved in with Irie and Tom, but Tom moved out so he could have more space and meet more women.
Tom, Alex and I started sharing a bed together and eventually all became intimate as a trio and it was magical
Irie says: “Now I spend Mondays and Wednesdays with Alex in our shared home together with our two cats.
“On Tuesdays and Thursdays I stay with Tom in our place with our two dogs. We spend the weekends all together.
“To help manage our time together we share an online calendar so we can arrange to see each other for the rest of the week.”
HotSpot MediaThe throuple have had some mean comments[/caption] HotSpot MediaTom moved out so he could spend time with more different women[/caption]
Irie admits they’ve had some nasty comments about their relationship.
She recalls: “Once we were all on a train holding hands and kissing and a man told us we deserved to die. I was devastated.
“Thankfully my parents were cool with it.”
Now the throuple plan to have a symbolic ceremony together in the future to celebrate their union.
Irie says: “I love having a boyfriend and girlfriend.
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“Thanks to our contract, jealousy isn’t something we experience. It gives us freedom.
“I’m grateful to have two wonderful, amazing people that love me, and I love them both, equally.”
HotSpot MediaIrie says their arrangement works perfectly[/caption] HotSpot MediaTom and Alex went on dates to find their connection[/caption]