DEAR DEIDRE: I FEAR I’ll lose my job after my boss caught me watching porn in my work van.
I’m a man of 38 and I’m married to a gorgeous woman. She’s 36. We get along well and our sex life is OK.
I fear I’ll lose my job after boss caught me watching porn in my work van
We have sex a couple of times a week but, if I’m honest, I’d like it every single day.
We used to have sex a couple of times a day during lockdown, when we were both working from home, but now we are back at work and my wife is travelling a bit more, I have to put up with less sex.
So I’ve started watching more pornography.
If she’s away it’s the first thing I do when I get home and I can’t get off to sleep without it either.
She knows I’m watching it and it’s been causing arguments.
She found my stash of porn videos recently and was horrified.
I told her I missed her when she was away but it doesn’t cut the mustard. She said unless I stop, she’ll leave, so I vowed to cut down.
I work for a big butcher’s, as a delivery driver.
Last week my wife was away for work but was due home, then was told she had to stay an extra night. I was gutted as she’d promised me a night of passion on her return.
The more I thought about it, the more I wanted her home.
I felt so turned on.
While I waited in my van for my cargo to be prepared, I decided to look at my favourite adult sites on my phone.
I must have been engrossed as I didn’t notice my boss approaching.
He pulled the door open and looked so shocked when he saw what was on my phone.
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I was so embarrassed.
Now he’s gone away on holiday but has said he’ll talk to me when he gets back. If I get sacked, I’ll lose everything.
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DEIDRE SAYS: You are catastrophising, so try to slow down.
You’re a good employee, so apologise to your boss.
Tell him you realise it was completely inappropriate behaviour and reassure him you won’t do it again.
More importantly, take this as a sign that you need to curb your use of porn.
Many people watch it without any negative effects, but when anything starts ruining other important parts of our lives it is a sign an activity has become addictive.
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You don’t want to lose your job, or your wife, so you need to start taking this seriously. The best route is to go cold turkey and fill your life with other interests.
My support pack Internet Pornography Worry explains how to kick this habit so you can enjoy a good relationship again.